


Suggested Retail Price

by keiji05



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Gratuitous use of italics, M/M, Shoujo Manga Shenanigans, Tsukishima Bros Read Too Much Shoujo Manga
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-06 18:11:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12216204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keiji05/pseuds/keiji05
Summary: Life is not a shoujo manga, Tsukishima Kei decided. You don’t fall in love with people you bump on hallways, declare your feelings in public, and live happily ever after. Heck, his childhood friend fucking left him before they even got to high school.“That’s not what is supposed to happen! You’re supposed to grow up together and then fall in love in university and then get married by graduation! What the fuck happened to the plot of my love life?!”his childish voice complained and threw a big ass tantrum.Now, Tsukishima is 20 years old, NBSB, and anti-romance… until he reunites with his childhood friend in the weirdest situation possible.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> things i should do: thesis revision, complete my unfinished fics, some other important shit
> 
> things i shouldn't do: start another fucking fic
> 
> basically, what if we applied shoujo manga tropes to two boys?  
> (also written out of spite: i'm tired of seeing non-tsukyam/side-tsukyam fics on the ao3 tag. ao3 should have a filtering function hhhhhhhh)

**Last year of elementary school**

Kei knew in the back of his mind that this would happen.

I mean, what else does walking home on a sunset but then stopping to detour somewhere with less people could mean? (Well, kidnapping could be a viable option too…)

But looking down at his cute best friend who still walks unsteadily sometimes, Yamaguchi Tadashi is anything but threatening. That is not an insult to his manliness; Kei theorizes that puberty will do wonders to him. And he would bear witness to his transformation, like a caterpillar undergoing evolution and emerging as a beautiful butterfly.

(He needs to stop reading shoujo manga, definitely. Who the fuck thinks on this terms anyway?)

They stopped on one of the wooden benches along the riverside, both of them hauling their schoolbags to the bench and sighing as they plop down. The river was lazily running through its course, the deep orange hue of the sun making it glow ethereally. Beside him, Yamaguchi cleared his throat, and the blond boy straightened up.

Yamaguchi fiddled with his hands, looking down at his lap. His short, unruly hair sticks out everywhere, which complements his round, freckled face and big brown eyes. Kei wants to reach over and touch his cheek, just a gentle brush, but he didn’t want to interrupt whatever Yamaguchi was planning to do or say.

“Tsukki,” he began, and Kei stopped ogling at him to actually focus on his words. “Will you…”

_Oh my God, it’s actually happening._

“Will you still be my friend even if we go on different schools?”

_…what._

“What?”

“Ah, um, i-it’s just… my dad came home the other day, and he was saying something about moving,” Oh no, Yamaguchi’s started tearing up! Kei hurriedly pulled out his handkerchief and press it on the tears that escaped his friend’s eyes. “S-Sorry! I wanted to,” _sniff_ , “Wanted to stay here, until high school b-but mom said they already enrolled me on a different school for next year.”

Kei felt himself well up. This… this wasn’t supposed to happen. _Nii-chan’s books lied._ This was supposed to be heart-warming. He knew all of the childhood friends-to-lovers’ stories by heart, attracted to them for some reason. They always start with a promise of staying together or reuniting in the future, when both of them are-

Wait.

“Yamaguchi,” he whispered as he dabbed his handkerchief on his cheeks, catching the stray tears. The boy looked up to him with such sadness he couldn’t afford to get mad that everything was falling into pieces. But if Yamaguchi wasn’t here to promise him forever, _then he’ll do the promising himself_. “W-We can’t stay together right now, yeah? But maybe… maybe in the future, if we see each other again…no, when we see each other again…” _Oh no, what should I say?!_ “W-When that time comes, then let’s… let’s stay together, okay?” _Lame! Pathetic! What kind of promise is that?!_ “I m-mean…”

But Yamaguchi’s bright and watery smile broke him out of his inner fight with himself, and cradled the hand that was clutching the handkerchief. Ah, that was so cool. Nice save.

“Tsukki, promise?” He held out a pinky, which sent Kei’s poor heart into a somersault to the moon.

He held out his own pinky and wrapped it on Yamaguchi’s, and the younger boy smiled at him with the force of a thousand suns.

Maybe Kei was still too young to understand to have a solid concept of what love is, but he knew deep down that what he’s feeling isn’t heartburn from overeating strawberry shortcake.

\--

When Kei learned that the Yamaguchi’s were moving the very next day, he panicked and dragged his older brother out of the house to help him find some sort of memento to give Yamaguchi, something to remind him of Kei when he’s far away. He settled for a cheap star necklace that even Akiteru protested at how unsightly the jewelry is, but Kei wasn’t asking for his opinion. He bolted to his friend’s house, heart pounding as heavy as his footsteps.

But all that was left is the leaving truck of movers, who informed them that the Yamaguchi’s already left earlier, and they were only moving the furniture and appliances too bulky for the family to move themselves. Kei felt his heart grew cold, slumping against the stone wall where Yamaguchi’s gate was attached to, the necklace heavy on his hands. Akiteru talked to the one of the movers, asking about where they were moving to, but the guy said he wasn’t allowed to disclose such information to others.

When Akiteru started herding him home, both of them quiet and contemplating, the sun had begun to set. They stopped to sit on the bench along the riverside where he gave Yamaguchi that lame-ass promise unbefitting of shoujo manga. Kei told his brother about the promise. Akiteru flatly told him he needs to stop reading shoujo manga.

Well.

If there’s one thing he learned in the last 48 hours, it’s that expectations were bad, and having them would on lead to heartbreak.

Kei is a smart boy, and he learns pretty quickly.

\--

**Present day**

“Alright, I know this part is kind of confusing but you only need to do the whole process once more. Maybe make another column for the new computation, then add it up on the first answer.” Ennoshita Chikara tapped on the small whiteboard on his hands, showing the solution step by step.

Kei adjusted his glasses, writing down the new information on his notebook. Beside him, Kozume Kenma does the same, but with less enthusiasm and more bites of his apple pie. On Kenma’s other side, Terushima Yuuji was surprisingly well-behaved as he jotted down his own notes, sometimes glancing at his phone but otherwise actually studying.

College definitely brings desperate people together.

They were on Ennoshita’s apartment, a spacious one-bedroom with modern furnishings home, which is rare for someone living in Tokyo. He admitted that the apartment was easy to get, but he negotiated the place with his parents. Kei was awed by the cleanliness and sheer space available; a perfect place to study. Their agenda for the day was Automata, and as much as he wants to tear out his hair about it alone, he’d been to several study sessions with Ennoshita and trusts his way of teaching. So here are the other Computer Science Class 2-A students, struggling with him.

He was finishing the last problem set when the door suddenly burst open, panicked screeching echoing on the hall.

“CHIKARA!”

A gangly man with ridiculous hair hurriedly jumped to the said man, Ennoshita looking like he’s having a heart attack at the moment to escape whatever is going on right now. Kenma dropped his apple pie and Terushima whistled as the man tackled their classmate. Kei winced at the loudness.

“COME BACK HERE YOU PIECE OF SHIT!” A different, booming voice appeared on the hallway, and the man who tackled Ennoshita shot up, rushing to the kitchen with a terrified cry.

“GO AWAY BASTARD!”

Another man, this one taller and more imposing on the other, stomped inside, his brown hair rumpled and pulled into different directions. Ennoshita took one look at him, before pointing out an accusatory finger.

“What the fuck are you doing here? And is that Tadashi?!”

The man rolled his eyes, cocking his hip to the side. “Hello to you too, Chikara.” Then he marched to the kitchen, where sounds of breaking and clattering followed. Kenma watched the whole thing with curious interest, while Terushima was busting his gut over the whole antic.

He turned to Ennoshita. “What the fuck is going on?”

“Sorry, just… wait them out. They’re going to leave after they finish duking it out there.”

“Hey… Tadashi’s back?” Kenma’s softly asked. They all turned to him, but he ignored them in favor of standing up and walking to the kitchen.

“I’M NOT COMING BACK TO FRANCE! FUCKING PRETENTIOUS SO-CALLED-“

“SHUT UP YOU UNGRATEFUL BRAT! I COULD BE CRUISING THE WORLD WITH IWA-CHAN RIGHT NOW IF YOU HADN’T-”

“FUCK YOU LEAVE ME ALONE I TOLD YOU-”

“WHO CARES ABOUT YOUR CHILDHOOD FRIEND-”

“WHO CARES ABOUT _YOUR_ CHILDHOOD FRIEND-!”

“JUST- SHUT UP! SHUT UP AND COME BACK-”

“NNNOOOOOO-”

“Tadashi!”

The entire scuffle suddenly stopped as Kenma stepped into the kitchen. The voices were no longer shouting, but talking to a reasonable but muffled level. Kei was unable to hear their conversation from where he was sitting, but he could hear Kenma’s voice with the other two.

Well.

That was weird.

Ennoshita sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Sorry about that. Looks like the troublemaker child is back in Japan.”

Terushima made a confused noise, tilting his head. “What? Troublemaker?”

Several footsteps stopped at the entrance of the kitchen, and they all looked up at the strange trio of Apparently Troublemaker, Unnamed Ikemen, and Your Local Social Recluse.

“Sorry for intruding,” Apparently Troublemaker apologizes, and the first thing that Kei noticed about him now that he could see his face clearly is the abundance of freckles smattering his cheeks and nose.

_Freckles…_

“Ah! You were studying just now, right? Oh my God, I’m so sorry for just barging in!”

_That… unruly hair… ahoge?_

“I’m so sorry! I’ll order you guys pizza or something, what do you want? I’ll pay for it all!”

“Don’t worry, it’s fine. Though please order pizza, I’m getting hungry just thinking about what you two have been up to.”

Apparently Troublemaker whined at the comment, but pulled out his phone from his pocket and grabbed the nearest leaflet of a pizza delivery. Ennoshita smiled, turning to him and Terushima.

“Tooru, Tadashi, these are my classmates, Tsukishima Kei and Terushima Yuuji. We’re all in Computer Science Department, so don’t mess with them okay? Guys, these are my… um, friends, Oikawa Tooru and Yamaguchi Tadashi.”

Unnamed Ikemen protested at such pathetic introduction, while Kei straightened on his seat, eyes locking at Apparently Troublemaker, who is apparently Yamaguchi Tadashi, who is currently looking like he’s contemplating fainting in the middle of a pizza phone call.

“Yamaguchi… Tadashi?”

He dramatically dropped his phone on the floor, staring back at the blond man with the same intensity.

“Tsukishima… Tsukki?”

_Tsukki…_

_Tsukki Tsukki Tsukki_

Kei felt his heart somersault to the moon and back, the worn, cheap star necklace he’d been keeping on his pocket for years now suddenly feeling heavy. Yamaguchi was stunned at his stare, Oikawa sighing loudly and picking up the phone to order for the group. Ennoshita tilted his head and hummed in question, watching the staring match between them.

Kei shouldn’t have expectations.

_“If we see each other again…no, when we see each other again… When that time comes, then let’s stay together, okay?”_

But for now, maybe he could dream.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was gonna update lipstick stain but got tired of writing smut... like... i want to write something other nsfw... so here ya go

**Manga Atsume Forums**

**You are here:: Manga >> Recommendations**

**Thread: [Shoujo] Childhood friends recs?**

**\--**

**Moonandthestars**

October 1, 2017, 2:49 PM

Hey guys, do you have any titles with the main pairing as childhood friends? I’ve read the following:

[Show Spoiler]

Any recs appreciated!

\--

**Coolerspeed420**

October 1, 2017, 3:15 PM

HOLY SHIT THAT’S A BIG LIST OP

Can’t rec any new ones, you’ve read pretty much everything, even the ones I’ve seen even in obscure bookstores in Tokyo

\--

**Moonandthestars**

October 1, 2017, 3:28 PM

I’m just a sucker for this trope (;´Д｀)

\--

…

Pages [1, 2, 3] Next

 

* * *

 

 

“Kei, I swear to god if you buy another volume I’m moving your entire collection to your room.”

“Nii-chan, should I tell Tanaka-san that you get off from reading shoujo with tomboyish girls?”

Akiteru sputtered, cheeks flushing. “What the heck is wrong with you? Ever since you came home you’ve been irritated for no reason.” He watched as his brother furiously thumbed through the newest volume of Monthly Girls, his eyes squinting harder as he flipped through the newest releases.

“Yamaguchi’s back.”

“…Yamaguchi?”

“Yamaguchi Tadashi. My friend from elementary, remember?”

“Ah, the one you were angsting about for years now?”

Akiteru laughed as Kei swiped the volume on his direction, his own face red. Kei angrily fixed his glasses and went back to reading, ignoring his snickering.

“Ah yes, I remember. The one you bought a necklace for and made a promise by the riverside during sunset.” He sighed, smiling. “How gay.”

“Shut up.”

“Well, if he’s back, then why are you here?”

Kei didn’t look up from the book, but his eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“Shouldn’t you guys go out and celebrate? That’s usually what friends do when someone’s back in town. And you’re legal, so don’t make that I-can’t-drink-alcohol excuse.”

“He left early. Said something important came up.” The bespectacled younger brother sighed and closed the book, dropping it on his lap and using it as an elbow rest. “I need better advice. I can’t rely on these clichés anymore.”

“What? What advice?”

“You see…”

 

* * *

 

 

“TSUKKI!”

Kei’s eyes widened as the brunet abandoned all doubt and jumped at him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and squeezing tight.

Everyone stopped breathing.

Yamaguchi didn’t give a fuck.

He looked up at him like he was the moon (heh), eyes twinkling, as bright as the smile beamed upon him. Kei feels like he’s suddenly thrown into a comedy show without a script and told to act like the biggest fool.

“Oh my God, Tsukki! You’re so tall now! I mean, you were also tall before, but wow! And this-” he plucked the glasses out of his face, and put them on. The blond blinked, his eyes adjusting at the closer proximity and _fuck_ , it’s unfair that Yamaguchi looked hella adorable with his glasses and Kei can’t fully appreciate it without squinting his eyes and developing migraine. “Ah! Your prescription is too high now!”

“W-Well, yeah-”

“Wait, wait!” Unnamed Ikemen lifted both of his hands and shot them a glare. Yamaguchi clung back to him, and he pretended that it didn’t kick his heartbeat up a notch. Nope, nein. “That… that guy is _‘Tsukki’_?” The way he pronounced the nickname sounded like he was asked to identify a pile of rotting shit. Complete with wiggling worms and roaches.

He was about to shoot back a sarcastic response when the brunet hugged him tighter, indignation written all over his face. “So? You wanna fucking go? I’ll call your _Iwa-chan_ right now, tell him how horrible you are-”

Ikemen screeched at the threat, cutting him off and making everybody flinch. “What’s so special about him?! He looks so generic! I bet you can find some tall, blond and glasses anywhere in Europe! Why do I have to chase you back to Japan just for this?!”

“He’s my fucking best friend, how do you like it when I insult Iwaizumi and his taste in friends, huh?!” Yamaguchi cleared his throat, and spoke with a higher tone. “ _Oh, Iwaizumi-san, I didn’t know you like to make friends with a walking garbage chute-_ ”

Ikemen threw the phone at their direction, and Kei had enough sense to catch it and tug Yamaguchi out of the missile’s way. “Fuck you Tadashi! I’m calling your parents now!”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever bitch.” He sniffed and took the phone out of his hands, giving him another brilliant smile.

Holy shit.

Is this really Yamaguchi Tadashi?

_Why is he so… so… extra?_

“Alright, that’s enough,” The rest of them turned to Ennoshita, who looked like he just witnessed some of the most tiring bullshit in the history of existence. “Tadashi, apologize to Tooru after that call.”

“Don’t wanna, he’s been an asshole since I left France and I’m not putting up with this treatment anymore.”

“You know he’s just doing his job.”

“And he knows I won’t stop until I found Tsukki again.” Kei looked at him, eyes asking for any explanation, but Yamaguchi wasn’t facing him. “I’m tired, Chikara. I’m tired of Europe and France and everyone kissing each other’s asses and those baguette-deep-throating maniacs-”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Ennoshita grinned. “Yeah, okay I get it. France sucked badly for you. Just… stop making a ruckus wherever you go. I’m betting Iwaizumi-san will be here by tomorrow, so apologize to Tooru before he goes, okay.”

Yamaguchi pouted, but the somber look on his eyes told everything. He nodded with a sigh.

Somewhere back on the kitchen, they all could hear Oikawa speaking in a sweet, sugary voice. Probably talking shit about Yamaguchi.

The doorbell rang.

“Must be the pizza,” Kenma muttered, dropping on the pillows on the floor and pulling out his phone. “What did Oikawa order anyway?”

“Who knows. Maybe the most expensive on the menu.”

Yamaguchi released him, and he sat down on the floor beside Kenma while the brunet went to open the door.

“You know Yamaguchi?” He asked.

“Yeah. He, uh, he’s quite the popular gamer actually.”

What. “He has like, a gaming channel?”

“Yeah, here.” Kenma tapped on his phone before handing it to him, showing the YouTube app with an account open. “But I’ve known him even before he started gaming.”

“How long?”

“Um… maybe four years now.”

 _Fuck_. Someone else, someone he knew, has known Yamaguchi during the time they were apart. The hard sucker punch of jealousy hit him out of nowhere, and he grumbled as he stared down at the phone. It was recently updated, with a vlog of Yamaguchi titled “GOODBYE FRANCE”.

“He sure hates France. I wonder why.”

Kenma hums, reaching for his phone again. “It’s not really the country. The experience, sure, but not the place.”

Oikawa had stepped out of the kitchen and went to the door, where he stopped by Yamaguchi talking to the delivery. He just stood there for a moment, before loudly swearing (maybe) in some language Kei didn’t understand. Sounds like Spanish.

“ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? YOU DON’T TIP IN JAPAN! ARE YOU SURE YOU’RE JAPANESE?!”

“SHUT UP, I DON’T HAVE CHANGE! IF YOU’RE SO ANAL HOW ABOUT YOU PAY!”

Well.

Kei didn’t know what to feel. On one hand, he’s really pleasantly surprised that Yamaguchi is back, and probably not leaving so soon. On the other, he’s so different the whole fiasco was quite the dissonance.

Wait. Could this be…

_A transformation arc?_

But like, he didn’t know that this would happen. Holy shit, he was so unprepared for the whole new Yamaguchi Tadashi storming into his life. Who was responsible? What triggered it?

_What would a protagonist do in his shoes?_

He bit his lip, flipping on his mental database of all the childhood sweetheart manga he’d devoured before. They usually contain a transformation arc in the middle of the whole timeline, but they’re usually telling signs, like a traumatic event or a flash of inspiration hit a character.

But Kei was absent on all of those years; he didn’t know what Yamaguchi had gone through.

_What would a protagonist do?_

Shit, he needs to read more.

 

* * *

 

 

“And… what? You’re using shoujo manga as a guidebook?”

Kei’s red face was enough of an answer. Akiteru snorted.

“Are you fucking serious, Kei?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu at [tumblr](https://variyama.tumblr.com/)


End file.
